I agree with you 100%! I too wasn't charging enough for shipping at first, and also listing my items for dirt cheap, and I sold a lot, but soon figured out, I was losing money, so I had to charge a handling fee also to cover for all those things you mentioned in your post. The buyer that doesn't sell stuff on eBay, really doesn't realize what's all involved in this, I think folks want garage sale prices, who doesn't, I don't really like paying shipping and handling when I buy stuff either, but hey, if I want it I have to pay it. My sales have gone down some since I've been charging more for shipping, but I heard one lady say, the folks that are under charging for their products & shipping charges too, will soon be out of business and the folks that have done there homework and figured out what they have to charge to cover all the cost of selling on eBay will be the folks that are there for the long haul and the other folks will be out of business if they do not take notice of the fact they are losing money by only charging .99 cents for an item and $1.00 to ship it, it looks good, but they probably won't be in business very long.
One other thing I like to mention, paypal charges you a fee on the total amount; selling price and the shipping price you charge, I think I'm correct? And I don't really think this is right, but if I want to use Paypal I have to pay it whether I like it or not? I'm not saying rip people off, but I figure what the actual cost is to ship the my item I've sold and I add the listing fee from eBay and the final selling fee and then what Paypal charges me, and I sell my products for a very fair price, and I also might mention I take a lot of time and great attention to packing these items with nice boxes and paper that I purchase myself, but if I didn't charge the extra for the eBay fees and such, I would have to pack it up and go out and work a real job, I would love to be able to give my stuff away, but it just really isn't the way to do business and I'm trying to establish a full time business!
I have also learned the hard way to not buy from sellers that do not list any shipping amount or shipping calculator; my son bought a computer monitor once, he won the bid for $15.00, the seller had nothing listed regarding shipping charges and when we received the invoice for the monitor the seller was charging $100.00 to ship the 15 inch monitor, I learned real quick to not shop with sellers that do not post their charges, I always state what I charge for shipping, so the buyer knows what they are paying and there is not surprises, at first I use to guess and have actually lost a lot of money, now I weigh everything and try to give a fair price.
Thanks my two cents for today...