I agree that it is unfair the buyers can come in and say essentially whatever they want and close the dispute. Like in my case, where she said she was going to pay - and she still hasn't by the way. But I suppose that it can work both ways, too, and some sellers can do the same. Most people on eBay are really great to work with, but there are always a few bad apples.
I emailed eBay and it took them about a week to get back to me, but they did give me my fees back. So it turned out good in the end, and I hope that you get your fees refunded, too.