Up for sale is ONE FUNNY Maxine,The Queen of Crabby bookmark or sheet of 30 address labels in your choice of PHRASE (see available phrases in list).

~1~ When life seems like an uphill climb,take comfort in the fact that you're mooning everyone behind you.

~2~ I find it helps to organize chores into categories: Things I Won't Do Now; Things I Won't Do Later; Things I'll Never Do.

~3~ When you're feeling stressed out, I think it helps to make a nice hot cup of tea and then spill it in the lap of whoever's bugging you.

~4~ That which does not kill me makes me even crabbier.

~5~ Getting older is like visiting an all-you-can-eat buffet. What should be hot is cold,what should be firm is limp and the buns are bigger than anything else on the menu.

~6~ At our age,the number one fashion question is: Can you nap in it?

~7~ Age doesn't make you forgetful. Having way too many stupid things to remember makes you forgetful.

~8~ Life is all about ass: you're either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it, behaving like one or you live with one!!!

~9~ Never go to bed angry...stay up and plot your revenge!

~10~ Don't believe everything you think.

~11~ I'm not short tempered! I can stay mad for days!

~12~ I'm starting to wonder how bad four years with no president would be.

~13~ Smoke detectors need to be tested from time to time. So sometimes I cook something.

~14~ When someone says ''Have a good weekend!'' I always reply, ''Oh,thanks! If you hadn't said that, who knows what kind of terrible time I might have had! I owe ya!''

~15~ Maybe I've been asking for too much. How about peace OR quiet?

~16~ How do we know global warming isn't just Mother Nature having a hot flash?

~17~ I'm busy right now. Can I ignore you later?

~18~ Shhhh...that's the sound of nobody caring what you think.

~19~ You're not yourself today...I noticed the improvement immediately.

~20~ Would you like some cheese to go with that whine?

~21~ Men are always whining about how we're suffocating them. Personally, I think if you can hear them whining you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow.

~22~ I'm out of bed and I made it to the keyboard. What more do you want?

~23~ Have a nice day! (someplace else)

~24~ Real women don't have hot flashes. They have power surges.

~25~ If you must burn our flag, please wrap yourself in it first.

ADDRESS LABELS
BOOKMARKS
"Think what's the worst that could happen? Prepare to accept it...then improve upon the worst."
Original Post
On the subject of printing address labels I would have to admit that I never really had much luck with my label printer. I spent all my time messing around with the printer and it still never printed any decent looking labels. In the end I decided to give up on the whole DIY approach and I found a british labels company to print my address labels, they saved me so much hassle.

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